Episode 81: Thats who I am.

I'm the type of guy that will turn up his radio, not only to prevent others from hearing his screams, but to prevent himself from hearing them too.

I'm the type of guy who keeps everything inside because he can't trust anyone anymore, for he has been hurt too severely too often in the past.

I'm the type of guy who looks, but never pursues. The one who's always quiet, in the corner, watching as others make total and complete fools of themselves.

I'm the type of guy who, once I know you, will help you through anything, even if I don't like you. The type who doesn't like to see people hurt, even though he's hurting so much on the inside.

I'm the type of guy that can make your day when I talk, or smile, because the only way I can survive is to see the smiles on others faces.

I'm the type of guy that gets good grades, even when he doesn't care. The type who will do any dare, just for the rare thrill.

I'm the type of guy that is numb inside, but wears a smile just so people don't see the pain I hide.

I'm the type of guy that puts up barriers so that people can't smuggle their way into my heart and hurt me more than I already am.

I'm the type of guy you can trust with anything, even if I don't trust myself. Any secret will never be told.

I'm the type of guy who hates to get lost in thought, for he is afraid of memories. I'm the type of guy that likes to do things by myself.

I'm the type of guy who is too stubborn to give up, to give into anything, no matter the cost.

I'm the type of guy that is hard, emotionless, hardhearted, apathetic. . . but doesn't let it show. I'm your 'normal' guy on the outside, but your 'not-so-normal' one on the inside.

I'm me. . . that's the type of guy I am.

Episode 80: Reality Check

I guess it just wasn't meant to be... I was holding on, hoping & praying that it would work out but in reality I was just kidding myself. What else can I do when I meant nothing to her. While she was the whole world to me... Well, at least I thought she was.. The truth hurts doesn't it?

I could go on and on about this but I'm not going down that road. It ends here. Time to concentrate on myself more. There won't be anymore of you because there is no more us.

In this game of love, the best man didn't win. You got lucky. The girl was too blind to see what was really going on. All the best to the both of you...

Happy days indeed...

Episode 79: Missing you

I miss you,

But I don't think you miss me too.

I always try to talk to you and see if you're okay,

But now I'm trying to push all the thoughts of you away.

I realized today that I was one person that was true,

But now you're only talking to the ones that talked bad about you.

I thought our friendship was pretty strong,

But all my assumptions of you have been really wrong.

I wonder if I'll want to talk to you at all,

And get butterflies just waiting for a simple call.

For some reason I just can't get over you,

Even after all the things you put me through.

Is it love?, maybe,

But why is it that you're the only one who can't see?...

Episode 78: My Wish List

My Wish List -

Someone who cares where I am
Someone who misses me before I leave
Someone who can't wait to hear my voice
Someone who loves me for me
Someone who thinks I am the world
Someone I can trust
Someone I can depend on
Someone who makes me feel special

And what do you do when this person walks in the door and looks you in the face?

You look back at the person who can't give you any of this... And let the one who can, walk right back out the door.

Episode 77: The Day After...

Juraimi had to work yesterday. He was not in "work mode" so he decided to come late. The rest of the day was bittersweet for him.

Juraimi received some hari raya wishes from some friends of his. It was very kind and thoughtful of them. He was expecting some more from other "friends" of his but it never came. To those who spared a thought for him, he wants to thank them from the bottom of his heart.

It was a strange day at work for Juraimi. A few of his customers actually wished him "Selamat Hari Raya" to him! That was a pleasant surprise. He guessed they acknowledged the fact that he had to work yesterday. Fact is, Juraimi didn't do it to get any body's attention or anything, he just did it because it was the right thing to do...

Juraimi returned a purse belonging to a Thai lady yesterday. She was so happy to get it back, she was willing to offer him a $100 reward for it. As tempting as that offer was, he humbly rejected it.

Juraimi's manager told him a story of how a former friend of Juraimi's who used to work there tried to blackmail him. He said she used a photo which Juraimi had taken and showed it to the Area Manager. Juraimi rolled his eyes back after he heard this.

Please, lets not talk about her...

Let's move on already...

Episode 76: Selamat Hari Raya!

Selamat Hari Raya to everyone...
















If your're wondering where the rest of it is, there isn't one... I hate this day. Go enjoy yourselves out there BUT don't ever tell me all about it. I don't need to know how much fun you've had.

Episode 75: Moving On...

You may meet people... better than me, more funnier than me and more better looking than me...

But this much I will say to you... I will always be there for you when they all leave you...

Episode 74: Honestly Speaking...

Some one's been lying to me...

I hate liars. Why can't people just be honest with each other. What is it that's so important to them that they are willing to lie to those they consider friends. I just don't get it.

I'm your friend. I accept you for who you are despite all your imperfections. Your problems are your own but if need someone to hear you out, I'm right here.

Believe it or not, some of your "friends" like me for example, do care. I'm not here just to add to the number of "friends" you have on some social website!

Episode 73: If You're Not The One

Such a beautiful song & one of my absolute favourites.

It makes me cry so much though 'cause I don't know if I'm ever gonna end up with the girl that means more to me than anyone or anything in this world ever could!

I hope one day I will end up with her 'cause I love her so much & life would just be nothing without her!

She means the world to me <3